so much to tell

Boy, oh boy! Have I got news for you all!

1 beginners rash

It�s Culture-Fest Time in Japanese high schools. Classes and clubs are wrapping up summer projects, preparing classroom displays, and selling tickets for various student-made food goods [i.e. snow-cones, pancakes, grilled chicken-on-a-stick, green tea, brownies, curry rice�]. This year, food-based and paper-based projects are big at my school [paper airplane distance contest�which I intend to win, newspaper hot-air balloon, paper lanterns�].

I keep getting hit up by students wanting to me to buy their over-priced and under-sized goodies. They know that I can�t tell them �no� when, bless their hearts, they sputter out some English-based sales pitch.

My senior girls have put a band together and will perform a number or two. They�ve unfortunately decided to name themselves �Beginners Rash.� I don�t know what inspired them.

Meanwhile, I�ve been slaving away devising methods in which to make pumpkin-less Jack-o-Lanterns, as I [and my mother] were lucky enough to be roped into the International Club�s project on Halloween [my least favorite holiday�FYI my favorite is Thanksgiving]. Recently, I made a very respectable J-o-L from paper mache and a beach ball.

I ended today�s day at the office by carving away at the biggest pumpkins I have ever have the pleasure of knowing. Carving pumpkins has always been an autumn highlight for me, but I was unable to share my enthusiasm with the finicky club members. I�ve never seen more disinterest in other cultures exhibited by any other kids in my school, than the disinterest exhibited by the International Club members. I like to think that there is actually interest present, but the poor kids� personalities are such that they just can�t let it out.

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2 hurricanes, tsunami waves, and earthquakes

Speaking of rashes, we�ve had quite a rash of environmental phenomenon recently.

Because I�m so far inland, I don�t really have to fear the hurricanes too much [we�re currently experiencing #18 at the moment�18!] I just get to enjoy the stormy nights in my comfy�albeit lonely�apartment.

Last night was a real treat for me because in addition to rain, I got to enjoy two small earthquakes. Does life get any better than this?

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3 judo

Last Thursday was my first night back at judo practice in 2 months [reasons being thus: pulled quadricep, trip abroad, 1 mo. in an intensive language course].

I was in rare form.

So rare in fact that I managed to do a spectacular face-plant [no, that�s not an actual judo move] into the tatami mat.

I am pleased to announce that my headaches went away yesterday night.

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4 letter to the dying

Ye gads, the word from pop is that it�s been received.

And while I�ve got your attention, I�d like to thank all of you�with the exception of a certain Mr. President�for touching my life even in the smallest way [i.e. reading this, planting flowers near your house, saying �konnichiwa� to me, a lowly foreigner�].

xox,

+L

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5 donations please

It�s become unmistakably apparent to me that the presence of The Site of Reversible Destiny warrants the need for The Site of Foreseeable Future.

[I can't believe that the creators of the Site of Reversible Destiny over-looked the need for the SoFF. By building SoRD, they sort of skipped over a step in the natural sequence of destiny inquiry. I think that given the opportunity, any person would choose to see their destiny first, weigh it's merits, and then decide whether or not to reverse it.]

Mark my words, I am going to design and build The Site of Foreseeable Future.

But, I need your support first [money].

And before that, I need to form a foundation.

And before that, I need to think of a good name for my foundation.

Any suggestions?

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6 god bless-goddamn my antibodies

There is no doubt in my mind that my hearty upbringing and my parents� genetic fortitude have resulted in the healthy individual that I am today. I am very rarely ever sick, and I have my antibodies to thank for it.

According to research however, I also have my antibodies to thank [or more accurately �resent�] for my seemingly perpetual residence in single-dom.

You see, it�s been shown that we are naturally attracted to individuals who posses the antibodies which we do not.

I believe that this leaves particularly healthy folks like myself [folks who evidently possess enough antibodies to get by without the help of others] totally SOL.

After all, it couldn�t possibly be my charming personality�or the fact that I live in a country which has a population that is an average age of 50�that the keeps the men-folk at bay.

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